Online dating sites see a big surge of new members signing up at the beginning of the year. Whether you vowed to make love a priority in 2013 or your relationship ran its course over the holidays, you’ll be in fine company with other singles looking for love online this year.
Gone are the days where only tech enthusiasts and socially challenged singles were hanging their digital hats on dating sites. Celebrities are creating online dating profiles and children are now signing up their parents for Internet dating. If your friends are no longer setting you up, it’s time to take matters into your own hands. According to the U.S. Census Bureau, there are 102 million singles in the United States. Over 40 million singles in the U.S. have tried online dating to find a love connection. The numbers are staggering.
So without further digital ado, here are 11 dating tips to help you find love online in 2015:
1. Be authentic
Post some of your favorite photos from Facebook to your online dating profile. (Check out these tips for taking a perfect pic every time). Dating sites now make it easy to link to your Facebook account to grab recent pictures. Discard any photos that are over two years old and please don’t lie about your weight, height, and age. Seeing a frown on your date’s face if he or she doesn't recognize you when you arrive isn’t a good experience for either of you.
2. Be specific
General profiles all tend to blend together and can be viewed as boring or too typical. Make your profile shine by being specific about what you’re looking for. Think about listing the song you like to sing in the shower, talk about a proud moment in your life, and allow your date to know what their life could be like if they had the opportunity to spend it with you.
3. Avoid clichés and emoticons
How many times have you seen a profile that says he’s looking for a drama-free woman or that she likes romantic beach walks, traveling, and wants a financially secure man? These terms have been overused and should be deleted from your profile. Don’t use the happy face or multiple exclamation points in your correspondence. You aren’t on familiar terms yet.
4. Refresh your profile
Are you excited about your upcoming trip to Mexico? If so, post it in your profile. Do you have tickets for a basketball game? Let your potential date know and you might be cheering on your favorite team together.
5. Respond quickly
If your dream date is writing to you, he or she is probably writing to many others. Playing the waiting game is so last decade. By the time you write back to him or her, you may be told that they’ve met someone they’ve decided to date exclusively. Don’t cry over digital spilled milk.
6. Proofread everything
We’ve all been burned by auto-correct when we’ve sent emails. Use spell check and grammar check for your profile and emails. First impressions are everything. You may have a high IQ, but your date won’t believe you if your emails are riddled with spelling errors.
7. Log on daily
Even if you haven’t received an email from a potential suitor, don’t sit around waiting. When you log on frequently, those considering writing to you will see that you’re an active member. He or she will know that dating is high on your priority list and will think they’ll have a better chance at receiving a response.
8. Elevate the Space
Drama no more! That will be your new mantra, meditation, or positive self-talk.
Get rid of all
the dirty laundry (aka exes) that is no longer serving you. Make the
phone call. Have the final conversation. Accept your part of the
responsibility. Get the closure you need. Honor your past
relationship. Now, close your eyes, take three deep breaths,
figuratively catapult them from your space, open your eyes, and move
forward.
Before we can
move onward to bigger and better pastures, we must take responsibility,
forgive old trespassers, forgive ourselves, and do some crazy authentic
work in order to forget prior mistakes.
Your intention to clear the space needs to be solid.
9. Ask for What You Want
Be specific. Be
outrageous. Be confident in your choices. Whether it’s a stunning
Pinterest board or a fantastic collage from magazine clippings over your
nightstand, jot your thoughts down in a creative manner that speaks to
you. Share with the world, your friends and family.
Now, visualize this person walking toward you when you wake up, when you are brushing your teeth after lunch, and when you lay down to sleep. Ask and you shall receive.
Now, visualize this person walking toward you when you wake up, when you are brushing your teeth after lunch, and when you lay down to sleep. Ask and you shall receive.
10. Decide to Put Yourself Out There
You must put yourself out there as much as possible, whether physically or virtually.
The most
effective place to meet your new love will be at house parties, special
events (e.g., weddings, bat mitzvahs, etc.), and fundraisers. At these
events, everyone’s energy is open, generous, and giving. A true
unspoken invitation for love.
Perhaps the
second most effective way nowadays to meet your new love is online.
From the comfort of your pajamas in your humble home, you can browse the
sea of online individuals. Having heard mixed reviews, I still am
unsure about the whole idea of “online dating,” but it’s a great way to
start practicing the art of dating. Practice makes perfect, right?
Dating is not
easy. Whether it’s Jdate, eHarmony, Match, or OneGoodLove, pick the one
that speaks to you. Have fun and meet new people. You never know!
Then, there are bars! Enter at your own risk!
11. You Stay Fearless
Be patient. Be
authentic. Be fearless. All good things to those who wait. The most
challenging part will be the radio silence from time to time. It’s
easy to become bitter and hopeless. It’s not a sprint, it’s a marathon.
Keep your hope alive at every minute. When hope starts to fade,
return to step three, visualize your new love walking toward you and
repeat. It helps.
At the end of the digital day, online dating is a numbers game. You need to play to win.
If you follow these steps, you will open the space for love. Simultaneously, you will also sharpen your character, build your confidence, discover your wants and desires, and tighten your awareness. Sounds like a win-win to me. Now, go prepare yourself for love!
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